Article:

WHO KNEW IT? - I WAS NOT DEPRESSED, I WAS JUST ‘LANGUISHING’

By Jayne Seagrave

 

I find it wonderful when someone presents research findings on a topic I can immediately identify with. I am not saying there are not numerous studies which are not vital to my life, but when I read someone has studied whether woodpeckers get headaches, or the effect of cocaine on bees, or whether country music makes you suicidal, my attention is minimal. No, that is wrong – my attention is non-existent. Which is why I am delighted to learn there are academics who are interested in studying subjects that I find fascinating; subjects which I can identify with and whose findings are relevant to me and my contemporaries.

While the effects of climate change on an infant’s intelligence, or the rise of alcoholism in middle aged women, or the demise of the Amazon rain forests are clearly relevant subjects which justify in-depth, funded research, and should be a priority for our politicians and leaders, my over-riding interest lies elsewhere. In these days of doom and gloom, when it seems as if everyone’s glass is half empty, it is refreshing to learn of a group of academics who have decided to devote their time to a subject which intrigues me – namely the study of happiness, and why some of us are happy, and many of us are not.

The World Happiness Report is the world’s foremost publication on global well-being. It has been an annual event since 2012, inviting a selected group of academics and researchers (including UBC School of Economic professor – John F. Halliwell), to conduct research on a range of topics on the science of well-being. The subject has gained international recognition with The United Nations General Assembly adopting Resolution 66/281 and proclaiming March 20th be observed annually as International Day of Happiness. Who knew?

Data from 2023 found Finland to be the happiest country (Canada was thirteenth). In that year Israel ranked fourth happiest. It is questionable if Israel will receive this ranking in 2024, which of course illustrates how personal happiness can not only be dependent on personal circumstance, but affected by external factors, over which an individual has no control.

I like happy people. I am drawn to the woman in my exercise class with the wide grin, adore the giggling six-year-old I encounter on the sidewalk who is running rings, literally, around his stressed father, or the cyclist singling loudly oblivious to pedestrians and who nearly runs me over. In this respect I do not think I am that different to many others. But what makes some people happy and others not? And if you are unhappy, what is the way this can be addressed?

One of the contributors to the 2023 Happiness Report is psychologist Corey Keyes, who has developed the concept of “languishing” and published a book entitled Languishing :How to Feel Alive Again in a World That Wears Us Down. I loved his idea of languishing – and immediately identified with it, not only for myself, but for so many people I know, or have known.

This academic is my twin, more so than that girlfriend I have known since my first day at high school, or my mother who has the most annoying habit of reading my mind when I really do not think she should have this ability. Goosebumps appeared as I read the words of this man who seems to have gained access to my inner self. It is as if he had laid me down on the psychologist’s couch, asked me to remove my shoes and spoken to me in a softly measured sensitive style, to help understand the complicated state of being me. In so doing he helped me to understand there were times in my life when I was languishing.

Keyes knows me. He understands how I think, how I feel, what excites and interest me and more importantly can offer an insight into my persona. There are times in my life when I have been languishing for weeks and never even knew I was doing it. How interesting to discover something about yourself Keyes knows of and comprehends.

In defining this concept, Keyes suggests that people who are languishing feel little. There is nothing positive happening in their lives, few things of importance; no meaningful relationships; a dullness; a nothing; a state of existence but little else; aimlessness. It is not necessarily a period of sadness, just an overall numbness. Interestingly, languishing is different to depression. Depression has negative symptoms, such as over-eating, or disturbed sleep patterns, or at its extreme, suicidal thoughts. Languishing is an absence of positivity. You just feel blaaah – sound familiar?

With these definitions it is easy to see how an individual who may be languishing, is defined as depressed. Languishing is normal, and a state we all feel at some point in our lives – like the emotions of sadness, fear, doubt or anxiety. The danger is that languishing may lead to depression if we remain there too long. Human beings are meant to change and grow and develop – languishing is a state which prohibits this. Like not exercising or over-eating or laying in bed reading bad literature or watching TV for hours, it is okay to languish for a while, but not for the long term.

Fortunately, as all good scientists do, Keyes not only defines the concept, but offers me advice on how to foster greater positive emotions to ensure I do not revisit my languishing state. This comprises of five components:

1. Find a purpose in life. This could be as simple as greeting a stranger in the coffee bar, or more significantly volunteering time to support a charity on a regular basis. I find purpose in writing. The first draft of this article is being written in a cafe, where I am avoiding languishing, and telling my readers how they also can. My purpose is to explain the concept of languishing to others through the written word.

2. Learn a new skill. This could be gardening, cooking, knitting, painting, synchronised swimming, bee keeping – anything which involves progressing and developing. A few years ago, I read learning another language is good for cognitive health. Now, every year I spend two weeks in France for intensive language tuition. The radio in my kitchen is tuned to Radio France, and as I type these words, I am listening to French rock songs, (I do not understand many words, but it makes me feel as if I am studying another language and being productive). I watch Netflix with French subtitles. I am hoping it will be enough to prevent languishing.

3. Have fun and play. For me this is playing with words as I write, singling loudly to Bruce Springsteen and Bob Seger when driving, attending Zumba classes, walking zigzag down the middle of the street, giggling on my way home late at night after drinking more than I should…I could go on. There is a lot of play in my life.

4. Adopt a spiritual or religious practice, or a philosophy. Foster a mechanism to help understand the world. I adore my time alone, which can be as brief as a two-hour walk in the forest, or as long as a two-week road trip alone across British Columbia; self reflection - a time to order and reflect.

5. Socialise. Create a community then give and receive from that group. Building reliable, stable connections is where trust and affection is created. This is the most important element. I work hard to retain and grow the bonds of friendship, never taking them for granted.

Over the recent past, and significantly since the pandemic, there have been a number of studies showing the incidence of depression has increased, especially amongst the young. The 2023 World Happiness Study documented evidence of this. Are our adolescents depressed or languishing? The five steps provide a base by which this malady can be addressed. From my own experience, I would like to suggest there are also external factors, beyond our control, which have led to, and facilitate, languishing. Elements like the pandemic, climate change, death of a close friend or family member, failing an exam. Likewise, there are external factors which can help dispel this state, falling in love, passing an exam, winning the lottery, hearing from a long-lost friend, going on holiday.

In summary, it would appear in those times when I thought I was depressed, when I was reaching for medication which awarded me an excessive amount of energy and a dream-like, hazy, contented but detatched state, I may have in fact not been depressed, but was just languishing.

 

 

Jayne Seagrave is a BC Best selling Author. The ninth edition of her book Camping British Columbia, the Rockies and the Yukon was published by Heritage House in April 2023. Over 60,000 of her camping books have been sold. She also writes fiction, non-fiction, freelance articles and occasionally teaches writing and publishing.